Dragged Deep Down & Under

Some friends can be the stupidest people on earth.

I thought that friends are the people whom I can trust & depend on, but things are the other way round instead. I may not be the material for a Chinese-act sorta friend but still, I'm a person with dignity & pride. I still believe that the most essential elements in a TRUE (yes, note that i bold & enlarge 'true') friendship are loyalty & respect. God damn it, RESPECT is the freaking most important thing. If you guys really think that being all friendly & nice, or worse, PRETENDING to be nice is gonna get my attention & let my guard down, good for you guys then, y'all fucking got me. I pretty much see your true colours now; I guess 3 years can change everything huh? Well, now, I really don't give a damn to who you people have become. You guys have really proven me of what "great friends" you people are. Yeah, you fucking shown it! Thanks for all the troubles you've put me through from sending your stuff all the way to town & getting fined as well. Not to mention by ditching me too; don't you guys have a lil' self-respect at least? If you don't want me there, just fucking say it. Why wanna drag the time to the very last minute? Damn pathetic, okay! You think I have all the freaking god damn time? I have other better friends to hang out with & getting my chores done. & if I were to predict this would happen, I won't even bother showing up. Seriously, if I were you people, I'll dig a hole & hide there for the rest of my life.

*

Well, I've changed as well in these 3 years, but I think I've changed in a way far better than before to be a wiser, more matured, sensible & more outgoing person. & I honestly have to thank my friends from KL & also waiyi who were & STILL are there for me whenever & wherever I am, from cheering me up to making me so mad! lol! Now, I know why I can't call JB my home even though I thought it is; KL is my home, where I truly belong, my birthplace... it's in my blood & soul...

**

Names are not stated, but if any of you* happen to come across my blog, read it & know who & what I'm referring to, well, I hope it makes you* realise the state you guys have put me through. & honestly, I won't give a flying fuck about how you* feel now. I'm through with you people!

signed out*

Bitches & Miss Pretentious.

why are you still there when I just want you to get the heck out?

you have to go bugging in my life.

do you really think it'll just make it hard for me?

well, yeah. it will. making it hard for me to actually forgive you.

oh wait, I'll NEVER even forgive you.

so what's the point really.

get lost BITCH!

I hate you I hate you I hate you.

urgh. it makes me so mad just thinking about it.

i guess that will only make matters worse.

whatever it is, I just wish you could just mind your own biz.

as for what you have in your life, it's not my problem anymore.

so what if you'll look pretty.?

you look pretty ugly on the inside already anyway.

I have something more special than just being pretty.

I have something more worthwhile for me to be proud of, THIEF.
*smirks*

all you do is just pretend that you're such a sweetheart & everything nice?

save it, please.

you can try hiding them from friends or others.

but sooner or later, they'll know.

so just pray that god is on your side.

I hate you, bitch!

who are you to touch my things & snoop around?

after everything you did, you are still so bloody thick-skinned to actually take things from me? things which include my money!

seriously, if i was given the chance, i'll slap you as if there's no tmr.

but all i can do now is to ignore you. i did ignore you. you're totally outta my world.

you're already invisible to me.

i pity you really.

by doing god knows what you're doing only give you a worse life.

so go on & continue, in the end i will still be the one walking away with a big smile on my face whether if i lose my stuff or not.

that's cuz the inside's that matters.

i shall wait & see your ending.

life hasn't been fair at all, just so you think that ppl around you know how you feel.

they're awfully wrong.

ppl like mothers end up scolding you for utterly absurd reasons.

what the hell is wrong with the world?

am i just some doll for all of you to play around with?

am i seriously a fool to pretend whatever that happened did not happen at all?

i did try to pretend that nothing happened...

that's because you told me so.

& why do you have to side others in the end?

am i such a shame to you?

i did what i was told, i did what was right. & this is what you tell me in the end?

i didn't know things like these will be so wrong.

do i even mean anything to you?

each time you want someone to release your anger, i was the one being scolded & blamed.

is that all i'm worth?

if it is so, i'll just keep everything inside of me until a day i can't bear it any longer.

as for decisions, what's the point asking me how i feel.

after all, in the end you still make the choice for me.

will you just get the hell outta my life!

you're seriously getting on my nerves!

what the bloody hell is wrong with you?!

get lost, bitch.

i had enough of random people adding me on msn. & pretending that they know me very well.

pathetic!

i miss you.

piggy back rides. (:

i'm back! yays. from the trip that is. -.-
well...
...

it wasn't as bad as i expected.


left school at 'round 8-ish. it seemed like it took forever to reach kuala selangor.
the mangrove is actually a park. some sort of a 'taman perlindungan'.
it stinks! =/

but got used to it after an hour.
the first round of tracking was BAD!
the sun was scorching. mosquitoes actually chased after us. goodness.


if you start walking, you can NEVER stop. if you do.
it's amen to you. seriously.
all of us got bitten badly. we were like nature donors or something.

but whatever. i was complaining alot during the first round.
what? *look around* i was hungry. i get cranky when i'm hungry.
especially when i'm the mosquitoes' food. *sobs*



went for lunch in this restaurant. they actually have air conditioning! :D
everything was done by 3-ish.
then off to the park again. -.-
ROUND TWO!

& this time, we have to go into the mud. as in real mud. stinking eeky mud. eww.

there were really tiny crabs & mud skippers. well, we have the choice whether to go in or not.
so i figured, since i'm already there, & it's not like i'm gonna go there again. hell no.
so i went in. YES! i went in! i'm proud :D
*can't stop beaming*

it was disgusting at first. the mangrove trees were around us. bushes & plants.
& worse of all. sea water. well, it's just up to our knees.
BUT..

...
it's mud underneath. we actually sink in. thank god i brought slippers.
i can't say that they are my life saver.
it get stuck in the mud as well. & it gives me double the work to get them out in the water.
luckily, ryan & alex were there to help me out. & not to forget ms. chang, the teacher. & my other friends. we helped each other thru' it. (:
i slipped tho'. ): my lower part of the body was wet. oh well. it was a great experience. lol. apart from the fact that i was wet & muddy after that.

***
after cleaning up, we went up the hill (a different place) to watch the sunset. i have the picture of it in my phone. will ask from my friends for all of the pictures. won't upload it now.

we had seafood for dinner! the locals there said the kuala selangor restaurant was the best seafood restaurant in town. so yeah. we were there. it was awesomely delicious. *slurps*
:D

around 9.30, we were at this fireflies place. there will be this sampan that 4 of us sit in & some malay dude will row it. RM10 per person. those fireflies are a beauty. &..
...
i caught one! i was the only one (in that sampan laa) that caught it. it's alot smaller than i expected. its butt glows! how cute. (:
& of course i let it go.

after that. we were back in the bus & heading off to kl. reached cempaka around 12.30. got home at 1am.
but it's all good. (:
photos will be uploaded later on.



waiyi oh waiyi.
1 more day! & you're gonna be home!
home sweet home, cousin! :D
ehh, you seriously didn't get anything for me?

***
i hate you bitch! i officially hate you with all my heart can hold.
you're nothing to me anymore. & you don't hold a single worthwhile place in my heart.

oh wait, i forgot.
YOU NEVER HAD A PLACE IN MY HEART BEFORE!
just fuck off.



signed out *

5 more days, cousin!




i can't wait.
(:
*beams wide*

***



i'm ignoring you as much as i can. & it's working splendidly for me. don't you dare spoil it, bitch.

apple bliss.

heys, sorry for the previous post. was kinda lost in my own world with everything that's going on. lots of sorry-s. waiyi jie, thanks for the advices, and thanks for trying to talk to my mom. *hugs* missing you alot. miss "sot-ting" with you. lols!
as for you, walter, thanks for staying up late and accompanying me...really appreciate it. i guess i'm better now. i love you loads, dear. *muaxies!*
sorry for making both of you so worried...


anyways. it was a great day ytd. well, i mean, it was but not after that. went out with my brother and cousins. the cousin brother came back for hols, was in s'pore before he came here.

went for a movie. rush hour 3. it was awesome, but too short. only an hour and a half. was kinda disappointed with the short storyline, but then again, it was worth watching. (: walter went with us. imagined, having 3 kids along with the boyfriend. how un-romantic is that. but he didn't mind, lols. he was hilarious though. they aren't that young, considering all of them are from primary schools. woah wait. no, one of them is in secondary; but in the remove class. the again, she's not any different with a 9-year-old. childish, ignorant, think-she's-all-that. etc.! so yeah. she's basically almost invisible to me. just glad that she didn't cause any commotions ytd. words can't describe the anger building up and toppling up inside of me. one day, if i can't take it anymore, she'll be ripped up into million of pieces and minced into meat. i can assure that. one day... she'll get a taste of her own medicine. oh i'll make sure that she get a taste of her own bitter medicine.! and no one can help her; not even my grandma, not even her own dad... and i know that day is about to come, she just doesn't know it...pity. NOT!

*.*.*.*.*

walter came home for dinner. my home. i mean, grandma's home[?] lols! grandma likes him... awww` lols. it was great having him over for dinner, he was all nervous 'bout it. he was cute. lols. everything went well. :DD *double beams* he likes my grandma's cooking and grandma likes him. you can say, he passed with natural flying colours. haha! grandma said that he can come over more often for dinner. his expression was priceless.

that's bout it. chooming just msn-ed me and asked bout plans going out with the others. mun was asking him bout it. not sure of the time, day and place though. so yeah. but i'll be going out on sunday.

gtg off now. bkt kepong is on my pending list of holiday work. urgh!

xoxo.

p.s: i need a place to learn to forget. my patience has its limits. it's for you to know whether to over exceed it or not. your life lies in your hand, really. like i said, i'll rip you apart if i have to.

k a r m a

!THIEF!

I HATE YOU!

god will take everything from you, one day.

i can ASSURE that!

i've trust you LONG enough!

there won't be another time!

i've caught you red-handed. so stop blardy denying it!

though i know i let it go this time, but i'm pretty sure what you did!

i know you'll get your rightful punishment, maybe not now.

but i know the time will come.!

and when that time comes, it won't be a good one.!

for whatever you did will bite you back once and for all!

this time i hold grudges. i never hold grudges for a long time.

i guess it had to happen.

NO ONE CAN HELP YOU AT ALL!

sweetness of barley

it's really ironic and funny when it comes to when people who lost someone they loved, wants them back again.

most of the time, it's usually the lost of someone for someone else.

and i'm talking bout relationship here.

it's partially your fault, and you know it.

but, you realized what you did wrong and regretted.

you want the other partner back in your life when you yourself stepped outta theirs.

don't get me wrong here.

i'm not saying it's not right that you want the one you lost back with you.

but i'm just trying to portray here is that, you gave up on them.

you hurt their feelings.

you gave them false hopes.

you took away the colours that were supposed to be there from their palette.

and why are you here again, telling that all you did was wrong?

why are you saying sorry?

why are you trying so hard?

you let it go.

so, that's the consequences that you have to bear.

pain, heartaches, loneliness.

everything.

it's karma really.

what goes around come around.

hmm.

in some ways, sometimes, it's hard to define that word.

you know the definition in your mind and heart.

but you dunno the true meaning of it.

and it haunts you.

that's what makes it so creepy.

sighh.

life.

c'est la vie, monsieur et mademoiselle.

*

anyways.

lol.

today was awesome for me.

he surprised me with an apple pie (though i don't like apple pie) and a container of barley drink.

he actually left it in my locker!

awww`

he's such a sweetheart.

moreover, he boiled the barley himself.

*beams*

awww`

and it's a lil' bit sweeter.

lol.

but it's the thoughts that counts! :D :D

i was so happy.

i love you loads baby.!

really.

though i don't like apple pies, but hey! i ate to the last bit, kay!

:D

oh oh.

it was from McD.
;p

sooooo cute`

not the pie.

him.

gosh.

i feel like a lovey dovey lovebird.

all bubbly with boiling love.

lol.

but i mean, that's the sweetest thing a guy ever did for me.

how sweet is that?!

okay.

'nuff of bragging.

:D

*

apart from that, zu and i planned to go for the cheerleading competition taking place this saturday and sunday at bkt. jalil.

then, everyone in class [well not everyone] said they wanna come along.

so we planned (in class) to go to mid valley after that for a movie or something.

i haven't been to the movies for ages!

jeez. god knows when how long.

tsk.*

wanna watch the movie "Alone".

it's stated that the movie was directed by the director who directed "Shutter".

[i haven't watch the Shuttle and i really wanna watch it]

friends and cousin said it's good.

so i guess, this movie will be good.

can't wait.!

(:

guess that's all for today.

have to start on my hwk soon.

packed with tonnes.

as always.

lol

oh well.

xoxo.

siging off,

-wenn-

+ a gypsy's mystical ball +

[ chiffon cake` ]

just got out from the shower.

feeling fresh and cleaner now.

wasn't feeling that comfortable in the morning.

ahh well.

daddy's day is today.

but he's not here today.

back in good ol' nigeria with mom.

so i guess, it's daddy's day with her i supposed.

hmm.

*

alarm rang at 7.15am.

set it just to wake the boyfriend up.

piggie laa u.

but love you for that.
*beams*

he had a friendly match in school this morning.

i just went straight back to bed.

then, there were lotsa noises downstairs.

grandma's scolding someone again.

quickly rushed down to check what'd happened.

not exactly would i say the usual.

cousin's been accused for stealing her money thanks to her lil' sister.

but then again, i know my cousin's been snooping around my stuffs.

just kept it quiet really.

i'm not that kinda girl that go around accusing ppl without actually knowing the entire story / situation.

she was crying.

went into her room.

asked her thoroughly what happened.

her lil' sister assumed that she stole grandma's money 'cuz she bought a new bag.

but the thing is, it wasn't even hers.

friend of hers told her to buy it.

so all in all.

it was a misunderstanding.

sad thing is, no one actually ever try to understand...

all complications happen because of indirect miscommunications and assumptions of thoughts and majorities of grudges.

i don't hold grudges.

well...

only to certain ppl.

can't think of any at the mo'.

lol.
;p

sighh.

what a morning.

started off with my english oral presentation preparation.

gonna do bout william shakespeare's biography.

great topic to start.

as if.

he's bisexual.

lalala.*

rumour has it all.

*+*

went out to popular last night.

bought coloured markers for my history presentation, a new file and a purple highlighter.

at the same time, i spotted a shelf arranged with stabilo coloured pens.

i love colours.!

oh my goodness.

bought 25 of them.

it came in a stabilo case holder.

the colours are so pretty.!

variety shades of red, blue, green, purple[!], pink. you name it!

love love love it!

obsessive much.?

well, colours make me happy.

he makes me happier.

che-wah.

serious! he does. :D

formal assembly tmr.

-.-

they post-poned it till tmr.

wonder why.

guess it's back to blazers and ties.

urgh.!

don't like wearing blazers and ties.

*

he's taking his nap now.

missing you, dear.

well, gonna go off now.

have to seriously start on my chart.

but.

before that,

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY, DADDY!
I LOVE YOU`

xoxo.

signing off,

-wenn-

+ a materialistic world +

[ auroras` ]

la dee da.

not exactly in the mood to blog much...

but decided to drop by and post something.

school started yesterday.

i hate mondays.

seriously. i hate mondays.

woke up tired.

sleepy.

blurred.

mindless.

all in all.

totally un-myself.

sighh.

the usual routines continue to pick themselves up and i had a hard time preparing myself in the morning.

tsk tsk.

can't really get used to it waking up wee hours in the morning and i mean 6.15am.!

-.-

sad case laa!

i want more sleeping hours.!!!

*snores*

ahh well.

parents are leaving tmr night for nigeria.

flight will be past midnight as usual.

gonna miss them like crazie`

sighh.

):

*

a m person (he/she/it called him/her/it-self that) from my cousin's blog has been talking shit lately on my cousin's chatterbox. really annoying. and ironic at the same time. hate these kinda people. learn your values. tsk.`oh well.

no use talking to ppl like these. they're the one making a fool outta themselves. can't change that fact.

gtg. ditto.!

xoxo.

signing off,

-wenn-

p.s: walter lee kok wai.! i miss you.!
)':